• What big concerns did you have about your draft as you completed the first draft?

I don’t have a central claim but I have a lot of evidence. My concern is that I won’t be able to work in a claim and that I will have to start from scratch to form the final paper.

• What did your peers like most about your paper? Be specific, perhaps by quoting from one (or more) of the comments on your paper. Be sure to credit your peer!

Overall, my peers seemed to enjoy my evidence and elaboration that I had on why the quotes I used were important even though I was lacking a central claim. Ben had said that “You have good evidence but I think you lack certain important things. You made a lot of good points but I’m lacking as a reader a main claim.”

• Where are you working best with Gee? What do your peers think you can do to improve on that section? You might quote from a peer and give credit.

I didn’t really use Gee a whole lot except to discount his ideas with Cuddy’s thoughts. Alex suggested that I “should try and add a little more information on and what your stance is on James Gee’s ideas of Discourse.” So I think I should see if there are any quotes to which I agree with Gee on and explain that.

• Where are you working best with Cuddy? What do your peers think you can do to improve on that section? You might quote from a peer and give credit.

I thought that I used a lot of Cuddy’s thoughts in my paper and I have shown her in a better light than I have Gee. Abby pitched her two cents in by saying “you need to elaborate on Cuddy’s work and explain what a discourse is. Remember the reader doesn’t know their work and the elements within it”.

• According to your peers, what are your two biggest challenges in your work with the texts? How do you think you can address those challenges in your revision? If you need quotes or “evidence,” be specific about the text you should bring into a revision. If you need stronger explanations of your Gee-Cuddy relationships, be specific about what you need to explain. (Don’t re-write the paragraphs or sections. Rather, explain what you need to do.)

The biggest thing that I need is to add the main claim and work it into the paper as a whole. I have mini claims scattered throughout but I need to condense them into one big thesis statement. After I develop the main argument, I need to find ways to tie each paragraph and piece of evidence back into the argument.

• Using the guidance from your peers, put your overall perspective (viewpoint) into a sentence or two. How will you help your reader “get” your perspective?

I don’t really have a main perspective, at least not in this first draft. For the final draft, I am going to focus on the fact that I agree with Cuddy on a more consistent level than I do Gee and that the idea of Discourses and “faking it til you make it” is important on a social level as one ages.